My daily craigslist search for stupid cars has turned up this lovely creature—a midnight blue 1985 Mercury Topaz for the low, low price of $600. Why do I want this so badly?

1985 Mercury Topaz
It’s $600, what could go wrong

This Topaz features the 2.3 HSC motor, which churned out a staggering 90 horsepower when new. It also features the 3-speed slushbox which is sure to sap half of those horses.

1985 Mercury Topaz
Mercury Slooooowpaz.

I can see few redeemable qualities of this car, yet my uncontrollable nostalgia for 1980s utilitarian econoboxes is at it’s height.

 Any reason why I shouldn’t ignore my inner voice reminding me that I’m becoming a hoarder of terrible cars?

ethan tufts

Ethan created Hello Road and started making car/travel videos as an excuse to get off his ass, go on adventures, make new friends, discover new things, travel to amazing places, and of course, justify his countless questionable automotive purchases. His infatuation with weird cars along with a shoestring budget often leads him to filling up his driveway with a brigade of terrible, failing hoopties.

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